Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life. Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust. Stop being who you were, and change into who you are.

Gone is the Fear

It is finally happening.  It feels kind of surreal. But I am not scared.  Last week I was, but today, i sat quietly and thought about it.  The fear is gone.

I have yet to sort all these things inside me, but one thing is for sure.  The fear is gone.

18August2010

i did it.

today i did.

I dream

I dream of many many things.

I dream of yellow chucks, pink prada canvas tote and a green sidekick.

I dream of matte nail polish in assorted colors.

I dream of Hopeful tatooed in my right wrist and Faithful in my left.

i dream of a dog.  I used to dream of a pug.  A black cute pug.  The dream now evolved to a huge dog.  A brown lab that answers to snickers.

I dream of new job. new friends. new life.

I dream of weekends packed with fulfilling activities.

I dream of habitat for humanities.

I dream of wonderful Sundays.

i dream of eiffel tower and new york city and going to Ellen De Generes Show with Clang and Z.

I dream of a better world.

I dream of meeting people - people in the future that will totally change my life.

I dream of a stronger heart.  a heart with no doubts and fears.

Psalm 23

Pastor Paolo said that our prayers become more powerful when we incorporate scriptures.  I have always been fascinated by prayers as a whole.  The fact that we are able to converse with the Lord is pretty amazing already, but making it more potent is just astonishing don't you think?

And so again after quite sometime, I opened my bible and read some.  I found Psalm 23 and loved it.

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
       he leads me beside quiet waters,

 3 he restores my soul.
       He guides me in paths of righteousness
       for his name's sake.

 4 Even though I walk
       through the valley of the shadow of death,
       I will fear no evil,
       for you are with me;
       your rod and your staff,
       they comfort me.

 5 You prepare a table before me
       in the presence of my enemies.
       You anoint my head with oil;
       my cup overflows.

 6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
       all the days of my life,
       and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
       forever.

thumbs up

thumbs up to God for making things happen.

Awesome. Awesome

Woot!

Note to Self

Dear Self,

its time you take the advise of others and stop being a worry-wart.  Things shall fall into its rightful place in His perfect time.  Take things as it happen and stop thinking, quit over-analyzing. Stop reading too much into stuff and just take everything at face value.  Remember, taking it this way is easier on your heart.

Love,

You

iPray

I went to mass yesterday with my family and found myself at a loss for knowing exactly what I want to pray for myself.

I know precisely what to pray for, for each of my friends and sisters and brother and parents.  I have my little prayers I say for each one tucked inside a small pocket in my head.. but when it comes to what I shall pray for for myself, it seems that I am unable to articulate in my mind what it is i want.  It is not because I have nothing that I want to pray for - this is actually the opposite.  I think I want so much that I don't know what to say first.

I was also thinking, if I pray for something, I have to be specific and clear.. and it has to be just.  Something that in my heart of hearts I know, I want and ready to receive.  And so, I end up praying for the little things in my life that is kind'of not so great now.  Those parts that makes me want to crawl into bed and stay there for weeks.  Those that I know starts the eating away my sanity and make me question.  For myself, that's what I pray for.

sleep

Lately I have been feeling really tired. So tired that I wish I could just crash in bed and not get up for weeks.  So tired that I couldn't think straight.  I need to sleep this off. Whatever this is.. I have to sleep this off.

To a beloved friend and brother

I usually know what to say.  But this time, I kept thinking, what can one say except..  May you rest in peace my friend.  I love you.


Philippians 1:3 "...I give thanks to my God in all my remembrance of you"