Sometimes, despite good
reason I do and feel things that I know I shouldn’t. To make
excuses is easy, but the heart knows and believe me the mind would not shut-up
about the truth. So I talk. I talk to myself. I try to reason and
argue until I can’t anymore, because I can’t even win an argument
with myself. I seek help. I call a friend – or two, to hash it
out. I listen and try to put reason to action. But I fail most of
the time because it’s just really too difficult.
Then I pray. My heart
sometimes does this even before my brain. It would cry out so no matter
how difficult it is, the sweet misery would be taken away. Then God, the
universe, fate would make things happen. It actually makes it possible to
do what needs to be done. A situation will present itself that would make
it easy for me to just do it. And sometimes it is bitter-sweet. But as
all answered prayers are, it is really not how we expected it and we just have
to receive and be grateful.
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